


Away With The Faeries

by Clea2011



Category: Primeval
Genre: Crack, F/M, Fairies, Mildly Dubious Consent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-31
Updated: 2013-10-31
Packaged: 2017-12-31 02:43:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1026339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clea2011/pseuds/Clea2011
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Written for Trope Bingo square 'Wingfic'.  I'd already created the manip used in the header for the au fantasy square but the idea for a related fic wouldn't go away.  So this piece of crackfic appeared...</p>
    </blockquote>





	Away With The Faeries

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Trope Bingo square 'Wingfic'. I'd already created the manip used in the header for the au fantasy square but the idea for a related fic wouldn't go away. So this piece of crackfic appeared...

 

Jess wasn't like all the other faeries.

For one thing, she was far too sensible for a faerie.  Faeries were notoriously flighty and silly, and Jess just didn't fit in.  For one thing, she spent far too much time sitting around reading books about mortals and the adventures that they had.  Reading was frowned upon in Faerieland.  The other faeries laughed at her and pulled her hair or tweaked her ears, because that was what faeries were supposed to do.

Her mother, Queen Sarah, was very beautiful, good and kind, and had ruled over the land for hundreds of years.  She was known as a great and wise seer.  One day Jess would be queen, but probably not for another thousand years.  Then she would inherit her mother's ancient powers and never be criticised again. In the meantime she was supposed to be flying around having fun.

Jess didn't want to fly around just for the sake of it.  She wanted to go somewhere, see the world.  Most of all, she wanted to go to the mortal world and see the creatures she'd read so many stories about.  They sounded so wonderful.  But it was forbidden.

Once, long before Jess was born, there had been a bright light up in the sky.  A faerie had flown through it and when they returned they were full of tales of terror, of cold iron and harsh lights, of dull colourless spaces and metal birds that flew without moving their wings.  Nobody went through it again.  They said it led to the land of mortals, and that was when the ban was made.

It wasn't the land that Jess had read about.  That land had handsome princes and bold, brave knights.  It had everything she'd ever wished for.  The queen had told her it held the warrior who would lead them to victory in their eternal war against the pixies.  She had said that he would be a great hero, his deeds immortalised in songs forever.  He sounded wonderful.

Then, one day, the light reappeared.

The other faeries kept away, recognising the danger.  But Jess kept watching it, fascinated by the sparkling light.  It was so pretty.  If it was there for one more day, she told herself, she'd fly up to it, take a closer look...

"Daughter..."

Jess hadn't even heard the gentle gossamer wings of the queen as she glided over to Jess's side.  Her gaze turned to the light in the sky, and she gave a small smile.

"Ah,  so it's true.  The gateway has returned.  The time of the great battle is almost upon us."

The queen spent most of her days searching through ancient texts and sitting entranced by visions, so was rarely troubled by the day to day happenings in Faerieland.   If she knew about the light, it was most likely from those sources rather than an advisor telling her.  The so-called advisors spent their days flitting around twittering to each other and doing very little else.  Sometimes they hid Jess's books.  Jess didn't like them much.

"Have you seen it before?" Jess asked.

"Once."  The queen looked quite sad.  Jess thought she was even more beautiful when she looked sad.  She wished she looked like that, all gorgeously dark-eyed and exotic, exactly how a faerie queen should be.  "Before you were born."

"The tales say that someone went through, into the land of mortals."

"That was me.  You can only go through once, and when you return to Faerieland you can never return to the mortal realm."

"Can they come here?  The warrior has to come here, to help us."

"Yes, they come but they usually return home."  The queen sighed, as if remembering something that saddened her.  It was the same look she got whenever Jess asked about her father.  She never had an answer.  "And then they're lost to us, no matter how much we love them.  It's best if we all stay in our own worlds."

"Except the warrior?"

"Yes.  We need him.  The pixies encroach on our borders more and more.  Soon there will be a great battle.  Many will die."

Jess chewed on her lip, gazing up at the anomaly.  "I could go and find him, if you like?"

"That is also written.  Someone of royal blood will find him."

Jess's heart gave a little skip of happiness.  "Me!  I'll find him and bring him back for you.  I so want to see the mortal lands.  You saw it, is it true that the mortal realm is harsh and deadly?"

"Everything you've ever heard is true.  And it also has very beautiful things.  You will see."

"I will?"

The queen embraced her daughter.  "It's written.  And you must come home, Jess, within five mortal days, because after that the gateway will close and you will have no way home."

"And I'll fade and die?"

"You'll live out a mortal life.  Remember that, no matter what you find there.  And only bring the warrior home.  Do not try to take a mortal as a mate, no matter how lovely they are.  Only bring back the warrior.  Not a mate."

Jess stared up at the light in the sky.  She could do that, and save all her people.

"I'll come home, I promise."

And then she flew up, hesitating for only a moment in front of the shimmering light before she darted through it and was gone.

___

 

The first thing she noticed was how dirty and foul the air tasted when she took her first breath.  It felt heavy around her, as if it was pressing down on her, forcing her to remain earthbound.

The second thing was the noise.  She had never heard such a cacophony.  There was screeching and roaring, harsh voices shouting, everything seemed to be banging and crashing.  And over it all there was a low hum that didn't seem to change.  It was oppressive, sickening.

The third thing was that there were people, strange, colourless, wingless people all running towards her.  So many of them, and every single one dressed in black.  It wasn't a shade that anyone wore at home.  She shied back from them, afraid.

The fourth thing was that she felt dizzy, unsteady on her feet.

And the final thing that she was aware of, just before everything went white, was that there was the most wonderful creature she had ever seen, right there, catching her.  Strong and tall, and he was carrying a gun.  She knew who he had to be.

And then there was nothing.

\---

"It's a faerie."  Emily stood outside the medical unit, arms folded.  She had refused to go in, and was insisting that they put the creature back immediately.  "They're mischievous and dangerous."

"They're also not real," Becker told her.  "That's a girl."

"A girl with wings fused to her back," Matt put in.

"Like a faerie," Connor agreed.  "Or the X-men..."

Becker immediately latched onto that.  "She's probably the victim of some horrific experiment," he agreed.  "Who would do that?"

"Abby should get out of there.  And you should put it into the menagerie," Emily warned.  "It will wake up soon, it's more secure there."

"You came through an anomaly.  Perhaps we should put you in the menagerie too," Becker retorted. 

"I'm not a faerie."

"Neither is she!"

Emily glared at him, but before she could launch into the tirade that was certainly coming, Connor quickly stepped between them, pointing at the large glass window.

"Look, she's waking up!"

With a glare at Emily, who looked completely unrepentant, Becker hurried back into the medical unit, Connor and Matt on his heels. 

Abby was sitting beside the girl's bed, talking to her.  They'd found her a gown which had covered her better than the little scrap of clothing she was wearing, and tied at the back so that it didn't crush the mysterious wings.  They had folded in as if they were real, but Becker didn't hold with any of that nonsense.  There would be a logical explanation. 

Still, when she'd walked... because although it had looked as if she had flown through he knew that was impossible... when she'd _walked_ through that anomaly looking ethereal and, he had to admit, bloody sexy in that skimpy thing that she was wearing, he'd paused just for a moment simply to _look._   And a part of him hoped that they wouldn't have to send her back anywhere for at least a little while yet.

The girl was staring intently at Abby, listening to what she was saying.  Becker had only come in part way through the conversation, but Abby seemed to be telling her a little bit about where she was.  When the three men approached, the girl looked startled, then saw him and relaxed a little.

"You were there when I came through the gateway."

There was an odd, lyrical lilt to her accent.  He couldn't place it. 

Connor hurried forward.  "We all were.  I'm Connor, this is Matt and that's Becker.   Emily's waiting outside."

"Because she thinks you're a wee faerie," Matt put in, with a slight roll of his eyes.

"Yes, I am."

Becker narrowed his eyes, and looked around at the others, wary of a trick but they all looked as surprised as he felt. 

"We can see what's happened," Connor told her.  "Someone did that to you.  Lester, our boss, he can contact the ministry, have them tracked down and arrested."

"Unless it was cosmetic surgery that you actually asked for," Abby added.  "They're very pretty."

"Stretch them out, let me see them," Connor requested.  

She seemed to realise that it was her wings they were talking about.  She stretched them out as he asked, fluttering them a little.  It was beautiful, but she wasn't a faerie.  Of course she wasn't a faerie.

"Can you fly?" Connor asked.

"Yes,  of course."  The girl was up and on her feet and suddenly those delicate green wings were fluttering as fast as a hummingbird and she was a good foot off the floor.

The robe was hanging open at the back, she was turning and...oh perhaps it didn't cover her better than that little scrap of clothing after all.  He looked away quickly, then noticed Connor was blatantly staring.

"Connor!"

"But look at them!  They're real!  They're growing right out of her back!  You're amazing!" he added to Jess, who beamed at him until Abby smacked him round the back of the head and reached up to try to pull the lower half of the back of the gown together.

"Perhaps she'd better have her clothes back," Matt commented.   He didn't seem to be as surprised as everyone else, but then he was Irish.  He'd probably encountered leprechauns or banshees or something.  Becker was still convinced it was a trick.  The girl was sinking now, tiring.  He wondered where the harness was that would have suspended her from the ceiling.  He hadn't seen it when... well... he hadn't seen it.  He tried not to think about anything else he might have seen.   It wasn't fair, making this girl play some sort of trick.  She was the loveliest thing he'd seen.  Ever.

Abby pulled the screen around the bed and led the girl inside.  The combination of her scrappy bits of clothing and the gown would at least mean that if she pretended to fly again she'd remain decent.  Becker was grateful for that.  Perhaps one day he'd stop thinking about that perfect, creamy, rounded... no, he wasn't going to think about it...

"Becker?"

He suddenly realised Matt was talking to him. 

"Sorry, what?"

The look the team leader gave him told him everything he needed to know about whether he was being obvious or not. 

"We were saying that Jess can't stay here."

"Who's Jess?"

"Me!"  The girl stuck her head round the side of the curtain, smiling widely.  "I'm Jess!"

Abby must have pulled her back inside.  Becker heard an exasperated tut.

"She's really funny and perky," Connor commented.

Perky... no, he didn't want to think about things being perky.

"We can't really lock her in here by herself overnight.  But Emily's not going to let us take her in."

"Me and Abby can look after her," Connor volunteered.  "A real faerie!  Jess, can you grant us wishes?"

"Of course not, I'm not a genie!" Jess told him, darting out from behind the curtain.  She was dressed, as much as the little green and yellow scraps of fabric that barely covered her modesty could be called dressed.  Abby followed her, still holding the gown. 

Jess walked on the balls of her feet, Becker noticed.  It was as if she were permanently dancing.  Or walking in invisible heels.  In a tiny, tiny scrap of fabric... No, he wasn't looking at that.

"Why aren't you small?" Connor asked.  Connor, it seemed, had a lot of questions.  The girl was hardly tall.  "Faeries are supposed to be teeny little things.  You're the same size as us."

"You know about faeries?" Jess asked.

"He knows about comic books and cartoons," Becker told her.  He still wasn't convinced.  Though he'd seen plenty of strange things come through anomalies so why not a faerie?  It would probably be elves and pixies next.  

"And myths.  Faeries are a myth, and most myths are based on fact," Connor pointed out.  "Like the Loch Ness monster.  That turned out to be an incursion."

Becker remembered it well. 

"So, are there elves and pixies too?" Connor continued.  Becker tried not to feel too distressed at the thought of having a brain-share with Connor.

"And leprechauns," Becker glanced at Matt smugly.  "I'm sure I've seen one around here somewhere!"

"Pixies and leprechauns are evil things," Jess told him seriously.  "If there's one here we should be careful."

"There isn't," Matt told her shortly. 

Connor was almost hugging himself with glee.  "This is great!  You can tell me all about them!  Can we start with elves?  The ones in Lord of the Rings, they're really old.  Is that accurate?  Are you really old?  Do you have faerie dust?  Do you..."

"She can't stay with you," Becker interrupted.  Jess had been starting to look confused at the lengthening list of questions that didn't show any sign of ending and he suspected Connor would continue in that vein for the rest of the day.  Matt raised an eyebrow, but Becker ignored him.  "What if she's dangerous?  I'm head of security, it stands to reason that she should stay with me for protection."

Connor looked disappointed, but Jess gave a little squeal of delight and flew over to hug Becker.

"You _are_ the warrior!  You're lovely!"

Becker kept his hands by his sides, because there was no place he could touch her that wouldn't be inappropriate.  He could see Emily glaring through the glass at him, and Matt smirking.  He tried to ignore the comment he heard Matt make about probably _needing_ protection.  He was just doing his job after all.  Very diligently.  And trying hard to ignore the fact that he could see right down her cleavage.

\---

Emily had lectured Becker at great length when she'd heard he was having the faerie as a houseguest.  No amount of protests on his behalf that if she was so dangerous then surely he should be the one keeping watch seemed to hold any water.  Emily had been brought up with all kinds of stories about faerie folk and the like, and seemed to think that Jess would be the end of him.

It was all rubbish.  Even if she _was_ a faerie she had been nothing but friendly.   

His flat was small and fairly spartan.  It had what he needed, which was a bedroom, a bathroom and a living area with a kitchenette at one end. 

He'd ushered Jess in, covered with the large raincoat they'd used to hide her wings on the way home.  She threw it off immediately.  He'd noticed she absolutely hated having anything covering the wings up.  She was also extremely nosey and was already moving around, looking at everything.

"You can have my bed," he told her.  "I'll sleep on the couch."

Jess frowned at him, puzzled.  "Why would you do that?"

"It's..." Just for a moment he couldn't think of any sensible reason.  There really was something about her.  "It's polite.  You're a guest."

"Why can't we both have the bed?"

"Um... I hardly know you!"

She nodded, and put down the photograph she'd been examining.  "Then we should mate.  You're very attractive!"

"What?"  Becker took a shocked step backwards, but that didn't deter her at all.  The wings were out again, and she fluttered towards him.  "We can't..."

"Yes, we can.  Mortals and faeries are very similar.  Normally we shouldn't mate, but you are the warrior so it will be permitted."

"I'm the what?" Becker asked, but she ignored him and carried on chattering happily.

"And it's a very pleasurable and traditional way to know each other.  You'll enjoy it very much.  You don't have a mate already?"

"No, but..."

"Good!" She fluttered forward again, and he found himself backed against the wall.  "I dislike the way some of my kind have stolen others' mates.  It isn't right."

"You're not exactly shy, are you?"

"I'm considered very reserved among my people.  They mock me for it.  If I were true to my kind we would already have mated many times.  Perhaps with your friends as well, although they are mortals.  Abby is very pretty and Connor would very much enjoy me.  My wings fascinate him."

That put all sorts of images into his head that he really didn't want if he was to work sensibly with Abby and Connor ever again.  And she was emitting a smell that was getting stronger.  Sweet, a little floral.  It reminded him faintly of a summer meadow though there was something else underneath it.  It was getting hard to think straight.

Emily had warned him about the faerie.  He turned, meaning to head for the door but she caught his arm.   Not wanting to hurt her, he tried to free himself with a gentle tug.  She was surprisingly strong and he couldn't get free, even when he increased his efforts.  He found he liked that more than he expected, combined with the fragile image it was quite a turn on.  It was difficult to remember exactly why he'd wanted to resist this.  He relaxed against her, letting his hands rest on her hips.  He could feel the edge of those wings delicate against his skin.

"You know after you lie with me you'll never want to be with a mortal again, don't you?" she murmured, her breath warm on his face.

"I know you've got a pretty high opinion of yourself," he agreed, and kissed her.

He was only partly surprised when her wings beat faster and he found himself lifted onto his own bed.

"You're strong..."

"Stronger than you.  You must tell me if I start to hurt you, I have never lain with a mortal before."

"But lots of other faeries, right?" 

"As an unbonded female it is considered very offensive to refuse, though as the queen's daughter I have the right to do so."

"The queen's daughter..." He was only half-listening to what she was saying because his clothes seemed to be sliding off him without any help. 

"Yes.  You must come back with me.  You're a very brave and strong warrior, you could bond with me because you will lead our army against the pixies, so you'll stay."

Becker liked the sound of leading an army, and at least he now had an inkling of what she was talking about when she called him the warrior.  He wasn't so sure about the pixies though.  The war of the pixies didn't sound overly heroic.  "Pixies?"

"Yes, horrible, nasty things.  Oh!  You're furry!"

Becker wasn't happy about being called furry, although she was wriggling around so excitedly about it that it really didn't seem to matter.  The fact she then insisted on stroking her hands through every part of his hirsute body helped as well.  And the scent of her was just overpowering now.

It wasn't as if she were as fragile as she looked or anything, and apparently if he _did_ refuse then it would be offensive...

Becker liked to think of himself as very well-mannered.

Afterwards he lay back, cradling her against him, watching her wings flap in a gentle, contented rhythm.  Not like they'd practically shimmered when she came, gasping above him.

He wondered if she'd always have to be on top.  The wings got in the way a bit. 

She was stirring again, sitting up and looking at him.  "That was lovely.  Again please."   

Well, again it was rude to refuse.  He took a handful of creamy white faerie arse, and pulled her down towards him.  "Just as soon as I've recovered."

Jess frowned at that.  "Here." She touched her finger to his lips, pushing it inside, running it over his tongue.  There was something on her fingertip, sweet like honey.  "I only have a few days here, I don't want to waste time waiting."

He was growing hard again, instantly.  She wriggled happily on his lap, those huge wings spreading out behind her.  Apparently she was going to kill him with her body and her appetite and her super-strength faerie viagra... 

But at least he would die happy...

\---

Becker opened his eyes slowly, then immediately closed them again.  Everything seemed unnecessarily bright, and the thumping pain in his head really didn't like that. 

He was quite sure he hadn't opened the curtains.  Because that would mean moving, and as every last inch of his body seemed to ache... though not in a bad way... he didn't think it could be him.  He let his head flop down on the bed again.  God, he was tired.  He couldn't remember _ever_ being that tired.  So whoever opened the curtains needed to shut them again and let him sleep for a month.  He'd tell them that, only his mouth was so dry it felt as if his tongue had swollen to twice its size and he didn't think he could talk.

"Becker, wake up!"

That was Matt's voice.  What the hell was Matt doing here?  Actually, Becker decided, he didn't care.  Matt could do whatever he liked.  Becker was sleeping.

"Wake up, mate!"

"You see?"  That was Emily, he was sure of it.  "It has ensnared him.  If we hadn't broken in, it would have stolen his soul.  That's what they do!"

It was Emily, and she appeared to have gone mad.  He opened his eyes again and blinked blearily at her.  Emily, of course, was standing in front of the window brandishing a broom or something and looking fierce.

"I haven't done any such thing!"

He knew that voice.  He'd been listening to it for... however long he'd been here.  It might have been days.  Long, endless, perfect days. 

He could also vaguely recall hearing banging on the ceiling of the flat below, of people knocking on the door and shouting at him, something about keeping it down, about children being in the flat and didn't he have a shred of decency?

He was going to have to move to a new flat.  It was worth it though.

"Jess..." He stretched out, but she wasn't there.  "Jess?"  It probably sounded more like 'Jeth', the state his mouth was in.

Emily had Jess pinned against the far wall with that broom or mop or whatever it was she was carrying.  

Matt handed him a glass of water.  "You're dehydrated, mate.  You've been locked in here with her for two days."

Two days... that didn't sound right.  The ARC security policy he'd written said they were supposed to check up on people before that.

"I rang you and you told me to sod off.  And then you didn't hang up...  Not surprised your neighbours are trying to get you evicted!"

Becker held out the empty glass and Matt went off to fill it up again.  Sitting up, he swayed a little, then looked around.  The flat looked as if a tornado had gone through it.  Or at least his bedroom did.  The living room was probably fine because as far as he could recall they hadn't gone out there.  In fact, he didn't think he'd left the bed.

Matt came back in with more water, and he downed it almost as fast as the first.

"It must go back, before the anomaly closes," Emily announced, giving Jess a little shove with the mop.  "We should take it back now."

"How many days have I been here?"  Jess asked.

Emily looked at her as if she'd uttered some awful curse, then considered what she'd said and answered that it was three days.

"Then I should go soon."  She looked at Becker hopefully, totally ignoring the mop sticking in her midriff.  "You will come with me."

"You must not!" Emily told him.  "You'll never get home again.  You'll be lost amongst the faerie folk forever.  Your body might return, but they keep your soul forever."

"Oh we don't do anything like that!" Jess told her.  "That's pixies."

"Apparently they'd like me to lead their army against the pixies," Becker added.  He thought he'd probably agreed to that at some point  over the past few days.  He might have agreed to quite a lot of things.  Jess was quite persuasive.  He had a feeling he'd done some sort of bonding ritual with her as well.  It was all a bit of a blur.  Still, sex and getting to be a heroic warrior didn't sound like a bad deal.

Matt raised an eyebrow.  "Pixies..."

\---

Jess couldn't help but laugh with joy as she flew through the anomaly.  She felt the filth in the air of the mortal world that was clinging to them start to fall away, and the relief from the sick feeling always there in the background from all of the metals around her.  She'd felt quite ill to start with and had never entirely recovered.

Her new mate was heavy, and they fell a little faster than she normally would.  But he would settle, grow wings eventually as his mortality fell away, and stay with her. 

Her mother was waiting for her as they landed.  She looked saddened.

"I came back," Jess told her, "I promised."

The queen wrapped her in a warm embrace.  "I knew you would."  She looked across at Becker.  "And you brought the warrior.  He'll help us.  It's written."

"And we're bonded.  So he'll stay with me."

Sarah stroked her daughter's face fondly, sadly.  "Oh my dear, dear child.  I did warn you."

Jess looked to her mate, confused.  They were bonded, it couldn't be broken.  Neither of them could ever love another.  And the queen had just said that he'd help their armies, that he was the one they were waiting for.  That would take a long, long time.  His wings would have grown, he would belong there by then.   He wouldn't want to leave.  Her mother had meant that Jess shouldn't bring back any other mortal than the warrior.  She hadn't said anything about not mating with him.  The warrior was different.  He would stay.  Surely he would stay with her forever?

But Becker was looking up at the anomaly, high above them.  He stared at it for a long, long time.

\---------------------------------


End file.
